Five teen girls have recently started an awareness campaign to help eliminate sexual assault at concerts. Their twitter account is called GirlsAgainst .
The call to action is quite simple. First make people aware that it happens. Then offer a few different tactics to cope with it as the situation unfolds. Even better, you can help prevent it from taking place at all. The most important thing in any sexual assault situation is to let the victim know they are not alone so the GirlsAgainst site also serves as a place for music fans to share their experiences. These tweets let a band know that a fan has experienced a horrific trauma during their performance. It make venues aware that their bouncers should not only be on the look out for these situations but remove those committing the offense from a show immediately. For me the most important piece of this puzzle is educating fellow audience members and alerting them to the fact that they have the power to help in this situation. If you see something that looks like sexual assault or abuse, say something. Ask the victim if they need help. Get them away from the person (or sometimes persons) assaulting them. Get security involved. Just whatever you do, don't ignore the crime. THIS IS A CRIME. Sexual assault at a show happens all the time and I am not sure which is more maddening, the fact that it happens at all or that people stand by and let it happen. If you are someone who is being attacked, let everyone know around you what is taking place and ask for help. People's attention are often at the band and not around them so it may take screaming to make those around you aware of what is happening. Do not be embarrassed or ashamed. You have not done anything wrong.
I am speaking from personal experience here. I have been going to shows nearly weekly since 1990. I am very well aware of crowd behavior, how quickly a group of people can ignite into a frenzy as soon as their favorite band plays their first note, and when the adrenaline kicks in, frightening things can happen.
There are multiple situations that can make a very large standing audience threatening in a flash. A very packed venue means a lot of strangers pressing up against each other and shifting positions regularly in order to move closer or farther away from the stage, gets drinks, or go to the bathroom. Some people take advantage of this situation as they pass through the crowd. They grope at breasts, asses, and before you can say something or hit them off of you, they are gone. Unfortunately some people also get off on these close encounters with strangers and they will begin rubbing themselves on you in a disgusting dry hump. It seems impossible that this could be happening in front of so many people but when all eyes are on a band and the venue floor is dark, it goes unnoticed but DOES happen.
I was actually once pinned against the stage of Wetlands in NYC at a metal show by a man I vaguely knew from a local band. He started dry humping me and placing his hands all over me. When I told him to stop touching me a number of times, the situation ended with me throwing numerous punches at him and me leaving the show. There wasn't a security person to tell so rather than enjoy the show somewhere else, I removed myself from a space I no longer felt safe in. When I began telling people about the crime this man committed against me, nobody wanted to get involved. It wasn't their business. Every single man in the metal / hardcore scene that also knew him, didn't have the courage to help me or let him know what he did was not only wrong but that it was a crime. It was a genuine sex offense. I was a victim twice. Not only was I attacked at a show by this monster but then my peers made me feel like I was making a big deal out of nothing. I was devastated. It still enrages me to this day. Who knows how many other women this man has done this to or is still doing it to.
There are more experiences like this, especially during my years of going to shows around the tri-state area through the '90s. It wasn't just hardcore or metal shows either; it was all shows. Especially after Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit" video came out, people (mostly men), decided moshing must happen at every show. I am not kidding when I say every show. The Sundays who are about as calming as a rainy cold day in winter, had to stop their show NYC because the crowd had whipped them into a violent frenzy. As a crowd builds energy and the adrenaline kicks in, almost anything is possible. The strength of this kind of group can move mountains and it can be very easy for a person to fall victim to numerous attacks - not all just sexual.
Again, speaking from personal experience I have had every possible combination of things happen to me at a show and only once was I ever helped. I kept going to shows, standing close to the stage because I felt it was my right as a fan of the band. I refused to be bullied but pushed, punched, picked up and moved, and groped I was. At a Mudhoney show a group of men made fun of me for being in what they considered a girl free zone at a show (IE the pit) and they picked me up like a bowling ball reaching under my dress, and lifting me from my crotch to then throw me into a crowd surfing situation. By the time I came back down I was far away from those creeps buy it had all happened so quickly that I am not sure I could easily pick them out of a line up or be able to find them among 500 plus people on the floor of the venue with security.
At many of the hardcore shows the attitude by some men was that women shouldn't be in the front area near the stage at all. As a pit began to build, no matter how careful you were to remain on the outer edges of it, there were some people who took great joy in targeting women by pushing them into the pit. Yes, ritual and accepted violence is already taking place in this area but then some people use this opportunity to cop a feel before shoving you as hard as they could in another direction. Again, things happen so quickly, the crowds shift and churn endlessly, so it can be very difficult to deal with an attacker or find security to try your best to try to pick out a person or persons who blend into a uniform look of that music scene. It feels hopeless so you either get used it or you end up standing in the back and avoiding these confrontations all together.
The sad reality is this happened to me so many times that I have lost count. There are thousands of victims just like me who have felt or still feel powerless about it. I believe it is possible to have bands, fellow music fans, and music venue's security working together to stop sexual assault from happening at concerts. We know this crime isn't acceptable under any circumstance so why would the music community want to turn a blind eye to this? Women buy music. Women attend concerts. Women buy merch. Women share and like your music related content. If you won't listen to our voices asking for help, perhaps losing us as a fan, an unpaid marketing tool, and paying customer will be what the music industry finally reacts to.
Read more about women fighting against sexual assault at shows here.
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